REVIEW - ‘The Wraith’ (1986)

I was a kid in the early ’90s. One particular Saturday, I was excited because my older brother was coming home for the week. He would be arriving late, so my parents ordered pizza. I spent the evening in the living room with them. We watched “Star Trek” (TNG), followed by “Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.” My dad retreated to the couch to snooze (his nightly routine), I loaded up on extra pizza, and my mom found a movie airing on TV to watch.

Back then, I was a chicken when it came to horror. The idea of a movie called “The Wraith” terrified me. It’s supposed to be horror, but isn’t really, though there is a creepy element and at least one jump scare. It quickly became a childhood favorite. I taped it, watched it, and quoted it endlessly, but at some point lost touch with it. Decades passed, and it was finally time to revisit.

Horror without the Scares

Released in 1986, it was written and directed by Mike Marvin, and somehow stars Charlie Sheen, who shares the screen with a cast of relative unknowns. The script is riddled with plot holes and inconsistencies. The acting is pretty suspect. The characters are over the top caricatures of what they represent. And, I say this with total respect, admiration, and love. It’s absurd.

“The Wraith” takes place in the deserts outside of Tucson. A gang of street toughs play a game; spot a nice car and force the driver to race for it. Of course they always cheat and end up with the car regardless of the race’s outcome. Flashbacks reveal that the members of the gang are purely evil. And seemingly unstoppable. Until one day. When The Wraith shows up, driving a supercharged otherworldly vehicle, and seeking revenge. Or, to simplify with the tagline of the film – He’s not from around here.

So ’80s it hurts.

Packard Walsh (Nick Cassavetes) is the gang leader. Armed with a quintessential switchblade, and dressed in a leather jacket, cowboy boots, and puka shell necklace, he makes for one of the coolest 80s villains of all time. Packard is pure evil. And fearless. One scene depicts The Wraith showing up at the gang’s lair, blasting away with a shotgun. Packard doesn’t cower. He doesn’t hide. He doesn’t run. “Buddy I’d put that kidney buster down if I was you!” He calmly hollers. “This Place is filled with ether and acetylene, dig?”

Of course, the rest of the gang is made up of typical incompetent henchman. Oggie, Minty, Rughead Skank, and Gutterboy. Each more outrageous than the one before. They belong in a Sega game. The characters on screen are bigger than anything any of the actors have done since. Obsessed fans know and love these goons to this day.

Is that Charlie Sheen?

Yes it is, Sheen is in it. In 1986, the actor was just breaking out with “Platoon.” Here, he has little dialogue, looks like he’s checked out, and a double can clearly be seen filling in for him in several scenes. It’s like his agent signed him up before he got really famous. So he filmed his parts in an afternoon and then got the hell out of dodge. Literally – The Wraith drives a Dodge Turbo Interceptor – an actual pace car that looks like a spaceship.

Sherilyn Fenn plays Keri Johnson, the obsession of Packard and love interest for The Wraith. Oh, and did I mention, the hick sheriff is played by Randy Quaid? You can’t make this stuff up.

“The Wraith” is 93 minutes of street races, explosions, horrible fashion, and great music. And some of the best one-lines outside of an Arnold movie. As one gang member (played by Clint Howard) explains what the supernatural force is. “A wraith man! A ghost! An evil spirit and it ain’t cool.”

“The Wraith” is a film you either love or have never heard of. I’m not sure anyone that didn’t grow up with it would want to watch. As a movie, it’s an abject failure. But, in a way, I think that’s what they wanted. Giving it a higher grade would actually be an insult. To me, it gets an F for Fun.